I have a co worker who is a bit of a bully. She is sometimes nice, but other times seems to go out of her way to try to make me look stupid in front of the other workers. I dont have as much experience as the other workers and consequently probaly dont know as much in some ways. I have been staying out of her way as much as possible, but anyone else have any suggestions. I am not going to talk to her, because she would deny it and probably would draw more attention to it. Anyone else ever dealt with a situation like this.
[question posted by snowy22315]
responses and comments:
It happens a lot in many workplace in any company and any country. There will always be one who will try to put himself or herself in the pedestal and act like she's the one in charge even to the point of hurting and embarrassing others. I have one in our office, and she talks a lot and being nice in front of many but talks bad against your back. I just avoid that person and keep doing good in my work. I hope that the person will realize and make some changes. [learn2earn]
Hi, I think at the moment if she has no plan of stopping from annoying you, you just have to ignore her most of the time or at least just try to be civil when you really need to talk to her. But what's better for the both of you would be to ask her in a polite manner why she keeps on pissing you out. You better talk to her directly to fix things up between the two of you because probably the two of you would be together for a long period of time. And in my opinion, it's best to do your job if you're at peace with everyone around you. [drewojeda]
you should not be discussing this on line do you want to loose your jobangryninja [shoffman2000]
I think she is safe on here. She is not postong this from work and she is not giving any personal or company names so how would anyone know who it was? [muscles4me]
I think by behaving this way she i just making herself look bad in front of your coworkers. You are doing the best thing by staying out of her way. [muscles4me]
I think so too. I'll say hello to her, but I am going to keep our interactions to a minimum. [snowy22315]
Hello Snowy, I have a co-worker like that and it pisses me off!angryhaha.. There are many bullies in every offices I think. Especially if you are working in a big corporation. Like I do. I have this co-worker who is a major bully and loves to make gossip and all! (which is completely untrue!) She was like jealous of everyone especially if you are doing well at work. What I do is... I just don't mingle with her, since she said things about me (which is very crazy) I started to ignore her...as if she never existed at all! Hahaha.. I know it is not right or anything but for me I don't want to deal with someone who is conceited and I don't want to incorporate myself her. I just mind my own business but, if it comes to work ..I don't care even if I hate her when it is about a certain task and we need to work on it...I can communicate with her. Just be professional. But other than that... she was like nobody. w00t Happy Lotting! [danitykane]
u can't change her to be a gorgeous woman...so ignore her and don't give in... Nobody likes someone without a pleasant attitude toward people...ur other colleagues maybe also dislike her... [kelly_hello]
You are right...It probably won't do any good to confront her. The best way to deal with it is to not let it show in anyway that it bothers you....even tho I'm sure it does. Just thank her for letting you know what you did wrong or whatever her issue is. Trust me, others can see thru people like this. I'm sure they don't think your stupid but they probably think she is a jerk for talking to you the way she does. [sid556]
Well, I think we all have some sort of experience with those kind of people in the work place. If she is not your direct superior in your place of work, I would go to the person who is directly above you. Tell your boss about your co-workers behavior. I can't think of any reason why anyone should have to deal with such a thing at work, or anywhere else for that matter. However it may just be a calling. If what you say is true about not knowing as much as the other workers, then maybe you should step it up a notch at work. Work harder, show more enthusiasm. If she is going to try to make you look stupid, then make it as hard of a task as you can for her. :) [CaptHowdy410]
I do my best. I'm not perfect. There are some mistakes I probably could avoid making though if I were a little more attentive. [snowy22315]
Maybe your co-worker is jealous of you that's why she tries to make you look bad. Maybe she sees in you a potential that you would become a rival for promotion or something. If I was in your position I would not show to her that I am affected with what she is doing. I will ignore what she does and work harder so that I will reap the fruit of my hard work in the end. I never experienced that with a co-worker but I had a friend who was like that. I realized she was never my friend in the first place because she makes me feel stupid so I just showed her that whatever she does doesn't affect me and that I am better than her which irritated her but she can't do anything about it. [hunieby]
HI snowy! Its really hard to have a coworker who is a bully. Why dont you report him to the HR. Well, if it wont work, avoid him as much as possible. But if you can't,just ignore him as if noone's there. Most of all strive more to improve yourself. Maybe he underestimate you because he is better than you. So give extra effort to improve your knowledge and skills so that you will have that self-confidence. Good luck. [triplejazzm51]
Thank you Triple! you said exactly what i was trying to say. Sometimes im just not that articulate lol [CaptHowdy410]
I have encountered people like that in the past. I would normally stand up for myself if someone did that, but I would do it in a civil manner. People like that are insecure but it doesn't mean that they have the right to treat you poorly. Sometimes they should be put in their place so they'd stop being mean. [rg0205]
your not alone, everywhere any where , whatever your nationality existing that kind of people.And im also victim of those kind people, what kind of attitude that one,sad to to say were all professionals.I dont mind that kind of people unless your doing your job, and you dont even hurt anybody from your co-workers.Dont waste your time to that people. [jemaries]
Aww...thats not nice, i guess there will always be this stupid people who have to push other people down. But i don know what to say but i am not happy with ur co woker thats for sure. Trust me ive been in that situation too.. but same time i mean i want to stay out of trouble [elrener]
Yes I have and I know it is terrible Just try and let it go over your Head as that is what I did in the end, if she sees she can not get to you she will get bored, at the end of the Day, she will not be perfect, no matter how long she has been there she is still not perfect and everyone starts at the beginning so please try not to let her get to you People like that need to be ignored as you sy she will deny it so no use reporting her unless you have Prove on it or a Witness, I hope that she will soon leave you alone and I am sorry that this is happening to you I know what you are going through [gabs8513]
Avoiding her is a best thing to do. Just be civil to her. Don't talk to her unless she talks to you. Just answer any questions she has for you if she approached you. Don't let her distruct or affect your work. She must probably superior to you in the office but she is not the one paying you. You are equal... she is just an employee like you. Try to limit your ineraction with her, talk to her only if it concerns your work. As much as possible if you have questions and others are capable of anwering it as well, do not go to her... She is not worth your time. Just do your work, she is not part of your work there... [lovelyn_medrano]
Practically everyone experiences it at some point in their life. Why dont you get hold of some friends of yours to say something in your favour when this person makes you look stupid. This works sometimes. Also such people are not strong at all. They often buckle down while employing such mean methods. Good Luck!! [allknowing]