One of the staff at the board and care where I live got a call from her daughter at 8:30p.m. tonight. She told her that her favorite uncle had died in his sleep. She was not due to get off until 11:00p.m. When I came upstairs and saw her crying, she asked me to go and see if the other staff was here and could relieve her. She could not stop crying.
When I told her that the staff was not here, she decided to stay, rather than call someone else to come in. I told her that I would stay with her. She did an amazing job. She had to give medication to at least 60 people and she hung in there. I would have been crying so hard that I would not have been able to see.
I really felt that her daughter, who is grown, could have waited until she got home. It was very hard to see her like that. She is normally a nice upbeat person, but she was having a hard time holding back the tears. There wasn't much I could say to make her feel better, but I was able to help her stay focused and remember things.
She would be right in the middle of doing something and totally forget what she had started. I kept saying little funny things to get her to laugh and it helped, but she was in terrible pain. I only wish she could have heard about it after she left. I was very proud that she made it to the end of her shift. So has anything like this ever happened to you?
[question posted by Rozie37]
responses and comments:
Actually I received the bad news on my way to work. On the day in question while a group of us were waiting on a bus someone in the group who was there before we arived mentioned something about a vehicular accident which took place that morning. We asked him for more info only to find out that one person had died and was still pinned down in the vehicle, then he mentioned the name of the person. After asking a few more questions to find out if we had heard him correctly our worst fear was confirmed. The dead man was a church brother. A bus came and we got on. We had to pass the scene of the accident and I cannot explain the emtions I felt. Thankfully just as the bus inched toward the dismantled car the firemen covered the side with the body and began to cut him out. Asmuch as I was in a state of shock I was torn between looking and not looking to see if it was really true but then I saw his wife and sons standing there and there was no more hope. It was a painful and terrible day. [tjades]
hooo.... is so sad... just pery to the God.... [Bhimani]
Yes, it was the day my favorite Aunt passed away from cancer. My brother in law came & got me from work. He didn't say anything, but he didn't have too. I knew why he was there. It was the worse day of my life thus far. [robsbrooklyngirl]
I can imagine how you feel. My favorite aunt died of cancer on my favorite day of the year, Valentines Day. Since that time three years ago, Valentines Day has not been the same for me. [Rozie37]
No I haven't Rozie and hope that I never do, but then again, if I was working and got a call from my family, I would rather know then than be told later especially if they were immediate family members. Not sure why later as I suppose it wouldn't make much difference but since most of my family are overseas, I suppose anytime wouldn't be a good time to hear any bad news. Sorry to hear about her loss :( [maddysmommy]
I probably would of done the same too and just left my work and gone home or wherever. I'm sure they would of understood! [maddysmommy]
Thank you for sharing this with us, I feel sorry for your friend and work colleague. Please give her a hug from your friends at mylot. Maybe you might like to share a copy of a poem that I wrote for a friend who lost her life's companion many years ago. Feel free to print a copy off for her too. ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ WEEP NOT FOR YOUR LOVED ONE We know you are crying the tears that won't dry For your loved one has left you for his home in the sky He's gone to praise Jesus his Lord and his God Be brave for you'll follow the path that he trod Weep not for your loved one because he's not far away And soon you will see him on that beautiful day The day of rejoicing the day of no fear You'll see him and know that he's ever been there. By Kitten1954 ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ Hope this brings some comfort to your friend and work colleague in her time of loss. HUGZ from Kitten1954 [kitten1954]
She did not come in today, but I am sure that her family and friends are there with her, helping her to find strength. [Rozie37]
Yes, what you said remind me of one day when I was in my college. That was a quite silent dawn when all of my roommates were in sound sleep. Suddenly the phone shrilled in the dark which woke up all of us. One of my roommates got up to answer the call but suddenly she cried out loudly, saying " mum is gone, mun is gone!……", which could be heard far away. All of us got up and soon knew the truth. The call was from her elder brother, telling her that their mother was very ill that could not come round. She kept crying there no matter what we said and did. With a great efforts she finally got on the train home. And in the such early morning, it really was a terrible thing for our six girl students! At that time I had the same complaint about her elder brother who is older than us. Could not he tell a white lie to her even if until the daytime? Was not he worried about her grief for she is alone in this city far away from home? Luckily her mother recovered again and she felt sorry for us then. Anyway, that was an unforgettable memory for me in my life! [luckymy2008]
Yeah, we especially the girl who cried in that matter seem to be grown up after that, we lean how to care somebody else and no matter what happens, we should calm down. [luckymy2008]
Hello, from your post I can see that you have a lovely, courageous daughter. I too received the news of a loved one's passing at work. It was my dad. He had been ill for a long time and was at the time at a hospital near my work where I would usually go see him on my lunchtime. For some reason, I decided that day to skip the lunch visit and just go after work so that I wouldn't be in a hurry to get back. Anyway, they called me around the time I would have been there. In a way I'm glad I wasn't there as I know they tried to resusitate him and that would have been very traumatic for me. I couldn't finish out my workday though. Blessings to you and I only hope my daughter turns out half as courageous as yours. [di1159]
When my father passed away from a heart attack I got the call at work. It was impossible for me to continue working so I left and went to the hospital to be with my mother. Thankfully my older sister worked for the same company so we were albe to leave and drive together. Her husband then came to meet us at the hospital to drive my mother's car home. This was almost exactly 17 years ago, and I still remember it in detail. [julievy]
I know what you mean. My mother passed away 28 years ago. I was ten years old and I can still feel the mood and see a lot of the visual aspects and things that were said that day. I believe it is etched in my memory for life. [Rozie37]
Oh yes a few times. It was hard to work through my shifts but having a job is part of my requirement. I feel so sorry for the girl you're talking about but maybe her daughter told her before she got home because she knows how her mother might get upset even more if she didn't call and tell her. [CatsandDogs]
You may be right. But I know that I would rather be in the comfort of my home while having to face something like that. [Rozie37]
I have never received bad news at work. My ex-husband did learn that his cousin with whom he was very close to accidentally shot himself while he was at work. My ex was about 17 at the time. My mom was at work on my 16th birthday and got a phone call from the police that I had been in a car accident (my friend was driving)on my way home from school. My mom started freaking out right away because they didn't tell her that I was fine! They told her only after they could hear her panicking. She still left work to come and get me. [moneyandgc]
Oh no, what a horrible thing to do to your mom. They should have let her know that you were fine, before they even mentioned the accident. [Rozie37]
I do not think the daughter did the wrong thing, her mother could have easily been mad if she got home and had not been told of it. I know I would want to know if a loved one died immediately, I always was afraid I would get the message that my sister died when I was working she way dying of cancer at the time, and now she actually passed on. what the woman did stay on at work was her own choice and not her daughter's fault, remember the old saying don't shot the messenger. [winterose]
I would have gone home, [winterose]
It is too bad that her daughter didn't wait to tell her. That was nice of you to stay with her, (you are a nice person). I had to tell my husband that his mom died and also his dad. He was working at the time, I had not planned on telling him, just that he needed to get back as soon as possible. That didn't work that way, as soon as I heard his voice I lost it. I couldn't keep it together. He was a truck driver and was out of town. I had called the company hoping that they would just tell him to head back. They did have him come back but they also had him call me at the hospital. When his dad died, I called the company again, we all decided to wait untill he got home to tell him about his dad. I was so worried about my husband driving back after hearing about his mom, he was very close to her. [Polly1]
Oh poor thing, I know it had to be rough on him. Hearing about an uncle is one thing, but your mother? And then he had to drive long distance? I guess when you know you have to do something, you do it and pray for the best outcome. [Rozie37]
yes in 1991 on my anniversary I recieved a call at work in the library where I worked that my husband had taken a turn for the worst and was back in ICU and I should come at once. He had just been taken back to a private room as they thought he was better so I was absolutly terrified and one of my coworkers drove me to the Tustin hospital. He was unconscious and never recoveredd and I did not get to say goodbye it is now 2008 and I am sitting here with tears in my eyes because I never got to say goodbye. sorryto be so emotional but his death was a complete shock to me. [Hatley]
I no problem about being emotional, I am too. I don't blame you. I know that hast to be hard to deal with. When I was 10, my mom died of cancer. I didn't even know what cancer was or that it could kill her. But the next thing I knew, she was gone forever. It is alright to cry. [Rozie37]
I've received tiny bits of bad news at work, but none of them compare to a bit of news one of my coworkers got one time. On the news the night before, they were talking about a couple and a baby that were brutally killed in their own front yard. Nothing terribly exciting happens at work, so a lot of the girls were talking about it. Well, one of the girls got a call on her cell phone that the girl killed was her niece. She just started sobbing in the middle of the room. It was so horrible to witness. [rpegan]
That is too bad. I know it was also difficult for you guys, not knowing what to say and all. That was the way I felt last night. I knew that I could not say that everything would be alright. [Rozie37]
That is horrible to have happened. Yes, I have gotten bad news before at work. I learned that my home was on fire. Luckily my daughter and stepdaughter were staying over at their granny's next door. This happened several years ago. [OreoCookie3]
Now that is something you would need to know right away. I am very sorry to know that this happened to you. [Rozie37]
Yes, I got the phone call that my sister had died while I was at work. I also that day dealt with a dumbcluck child care person where my great niece was being cared for, and also had her parent teacher conference. I worked to keep my mind off of things, but I did not have to do something like pass meds. Rozie, you are an exceptional friend and client for this staff member, bless your heart. [GardenGerty]
She and I got along from the beginning because she is very down to earth. I felt so bad for her being here and not able to leave. I can identify needing to leat loose and cry and not be able to. [Rozie37]